tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7114567281547196356.post5456804546349992210..comments2024-02-07T07:18:47.235-06:00Comments on Signs of Life : The Brownie Chronicles: It's Not All RosesSarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14321300707913704883noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7114567281547196356.post-49450536489061071512013-03-31T12:01:27.341-05:002013-03-31T12:01:27.341-05:00Some other things to know about my boy.. when he f...Some other things to know about my boy.. when he first got here, Spanish sign was all he knew (and very little of that). The very small amount of hearing that he has in one ear, all he heard was Spanish being spoken. So he has had a LOT to overcome. He is learning English AND Sign at the same time.. and he is learning ASL, PSE and SEE in one shot. Or.. at least he was when he was at the old school and had THE BEST deaf ed teachers I've ever met. Both of them quite young to be doing what they do, the first was a young man who was offered a little better position at the Deaf school and took it part of the way through the first year, though he had worked with my boy during his first couple months in this school (which was the last couple months of the previous school year) and then his replacement, a young woman who is REMARKABLE and who I worried would not be able to fill the shoes of her predecessor, but she did and more. <br /><br />When they shut the program down, she lost her job, and I lost mine, there were 20 some kids in the whole district who were deaf and who this teacher visited once a week and then skyped with once a week. In our school there were five deaf students, all of which have since been mainstreamed. <br /><br />Long story.. a Novel really. All to tell you that perhaps RAD is something you want to ask about for your boys. Also, due to teaching martial arts to a boy who is deaf, I was able to create a whole style of martial arts that mixes the hand shapes of ASL and the techniques of karate. We call it "DEAF"-ense and it is being taught in Ohio at my old school. I'm looking to start a school here, but it is not easy.<br /><br />Thank you for what you did and what you continue to do with these two extraordinary young men. They are in good hands, I'm sure.<br /><br />KarenThe Heathen Angelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05402960765849786100noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7114567281547196356.post-17342067084896237062013-03-31T11:59:46.978-05:002013-03-31T11:59:46.978-05:00Another day, we made cookies.. and he had to read ...Another day, we made cookies.. and he had to read the recipe to me and THEN he had to do math because we decided we were going to double the batch and how can we do that? He figured it out. And then there were times that we would just sit and read books.<br /><br />Anyway... The next school year started and Mom and Dad asked if I would be willing to get him off the bus and keep him for the two hours after school before Mom and Dad got home. How could I say "no". His grades had improved markedly, he was having fewer and fewer outbursts, his interpersonal skills were improving, socially he was coming out of his cocoon and starting to interact with other students in a nonviolent way. Then the middle of the school year, due to a financial issue, I had to quit my job. I talked with the administrators at the school and was told that if I quit, they would hire me back as a substitute to work at my same position until they could find a replacement. During that time, I could REAPPLY for my position and be hired back permanent. After winter break, I waited for the call that subs wait for.. and it never came. They decided to reneg on their word. They did not call me back to work in my same position. They DID call me occasionally to work at other schools or in other classrooms, but they had other plans for the deaf program.<br /><br />My boy's grades started to slump, his behaviors started to get works, he became increasingly violent and was even suspended several times. When I worked with him, I was able to tolerate a little more than his new interpreter (hired from a service and who said, "I'm just an interpreter I don't handle behaviors") and I would steer him clear of trouble as I predicted it coming on. His Mom and Dad were not sure what to do, but the end of school was coming up so they tried to ride it out in the hopes that they would be able to work it out with the school. I was still getting him off the bus and he and I would have long talks over coke and homework. I would express my disappointment with his behavior and finally the end of school came.<br /><br />When the new year started, they moved him to a different school because they shut the deaf program completely down. His grades are ok now, his behaviors are a work in progress, but he's also a little older and a little more mature. <br /><br />When I met him, he had been in the country less than 9 months. I am so thankful to his parents for allowing me the time I have had to work with him and I view them as truly wonderful people who have given this young man a real shot at a good life. In Peru, at this age (we guess his real age to be 15 or so, but on paper he just turned 12), his body would be ripe for organ harvesting. And while that sounds like a HORRIBLE thing to say, it is a reality that poor Peruvian boys and girls face... especially those without families, and especially those who do not have the means to protect themselves.. such as being deaf and not having good communication.<br />The Heathen Angelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05402960765849786100noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7114567281547196356.post-52496650533506108812013-03-31T11:58:46.895-05:002013-03-31T11:58:46.895-05:00As I said, he didn't like me. If I touched his...As I said, he didn't like me. If I touched his shoulder to get his attention, he would "wipe it off". If I tapped his desk to show him something in particular, he would wipe that off too. And if I handed him a pencil or piece of paper, so that he could get to work.. he would wipe those off before he started using them. He had some other quirks that are explained by the RAD such as picking his own hair off his body (this is mistakenly dx as autism due to the similarity of stimming, but thankfully he had a great therapist that recognized it for what it was) and if he couldn't get access to his own hairs, he would start picking mine.<br /><br />Over the first school year that I worked with him, we started to get close. Just a little background on ME personally, I've been a martial arts instructor for over 25 years and I have a level of discipline that I adhere to and can sometimes use it to intimidate the small ones. There were days I went home with bruises, scratches, covered in spit, missing some hairs on my arm or my head and most of the time, with a broken heart. I got discouraged a lot in the beginning and when he would act up, I felt that somehow I had failed him. This was before I knew about the RAD. <br /><br />As I said, he and I grew closer and closer. I began offering free karate classes in the park and his Mom started bringing him to them. Since I could sign, he didn't need an interpreter to attend the class I was a kind of "one stop shopping" for his Saturday mornings. He quickly became one of my best students. Because he had to focus on me to understand, he didn't have a lot of times that he "wandered off in his brain". <br /><br />Then, due to personal issues, I had to stop the classes... Summer came and Mom and Dad were told he would have to attend Summer School... there are no interpreters for this program, oddly enough so Mom and Dad petitioned the school and the school allowed me to work with him as his one on one interpreter during summer school. (During the regular school year, I had another little boy that I interpreted for at the same time).<br /><br />As we neared the end of the Summer School session, Mom asked if I might be available to babysit during the day since there was no one who could control him like me. (He didn't hate me anymore, in fact, he would hold my arm everywhere we went and no more wiping things off, more infrequent picking of the fur, fewer outbursts.. but he did still have a few violent outbursts and when he did, they knew that I could handle it) I agreed and kept him over the remainder of summer, during the days. Though school was out.. school wasn't OUT. We worked on reading, and we worked on math and we worked on thinking... he just didn't know it because it was hidden in fun activities. We had a scavenger hunt that ended at McDonald's, his FAVORITE place in the world. And he had to read (in English) all the little clues. It took me two days to prepare for it because we drove all over town to find the clues that my son and I had placed the day before we pulled this off. There were clues in the library, clues at the park, clues in the neighbor's yard, up the street.. you get the idea. But he read them. And the clues weren't easy.. "Go to the Library". They were clues that made him think. "You will find your next clue where you can find any book you want." The Heathen Angelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05402960765849786100noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7114567281547196356.post-24661755933790920512013-03-31T11:58:09.533-05:002013-03-31T11:58:09.533-05:00Hi, Sarah.. new to your page and loving what I'...Hi, Sarah.. new to your page and loving what I've seen so far. I have been perusing and watching the videos of the boys and family and I have fallen in love with your two little ones, they are absolutely adorable. Then I happen across this entry and something REALLY struck me. <br /><br />Just a little "build up" so you know where I'm coming from. I am not deaf, I have not adopted any children, let alone any deaf children... however, for two years, I worked in the local elementary school with a young man who was adopted from Peru, and who is deaf. His parents found him there when he was MAYBE 7 or 8 (no one kept records, so there is no way to know exactly how old he is or the exact day of his birth--sad). He had been in two different orphanages in Peru from the time he was 3 or 4 (again, no one really knew) and before that, he had been abandoned. A woman in the town found him on her doorstep. I won't go into his story too much, I'm not sure his parents would want me to breech privacy like that.. but I do want to illustrate that due to all this, the young man, whom I have come to LOVE DEARLY (He's like my best friend now, more on that later) suffers from something that is common among adopted kids, especially those who have been abandoned. It is called Reactive Attachment Disorder. Perhaps it is something that you might want to check into. There are websites out there that can really give you a lot of information.<br /><br />Anyway, I started working at the local school as an Interpreter and paraprofessional. Mind you, I'm not certified in sign or interpreting, I had used it as my foreign language requirement in college and hadn't used it in YEARS. I moved from Ohio to Florida and began applying for jobs, saw this job for an interpreter at the local school and didn't really think I would get it, seeing as how that had not been my focus in school, or in the job hunt.. but felt it would be worth it to apply, just to play the odds. (if you throw a hundred darts at a dartboard, you have a higher chance of one sticking than if you only throw 90). <br /><br />My little buddy, when I first met him did NOT like me. I didn't take it TOO personal, he didn't like anyone. He was literally fresh off the plane. Mom and Dad had had him in several schools and he had actually been kicked out of the Deaf school because of his outbursts and behavior. It was a challenge to keep him from getting himself into trouble here at this school... and it wasn't my job to see to it that he DID keep himself out of trouble, but I fell for the boy immediately and started doing what I could to divert trouble before it started, or diffuse it as quickly as I could once it had started. The Heathen Angelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05402960765849786100noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7114567281547196356.post-39852946584512958432013-03-08T10:00:06.973-06:002013-03-08T10:00:06.973-06:00I have a son who is 11yo and HOH (mild to moderate...I have a son who is 11yo and HOH (mild to moderate, Connexin 26). At this point he still has occasionally meltdowns also, but it is due to a language disorder he has. Over time, as your son's language gap closes so should the meltdowns. You are doing a wonderful job with him and remember that it will get easier! <br /> ---LeeAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7114567281547196356.post-28889088077056403082013-03-07T20:44:57.405-06:002013-03-07T20:44:57.405-06:00Hey there, I've been following since you poste...Hey there, I've been following since you posted "car talk" a while back!<br />I'm not sure if it's any consolation or help at all, but your description sounds almost identical to our 3.5 (almost 4 year old). She's a MAJOR rule follower, but if something isn't EXACTLY how she expects it to be then she flies into a fit that she has a hard time calming herself down from. There's a lot more to the story (colic, migraines since she was 6 months old, food intolerances, never napping-even as an infant etc) but we ended up working with a behavioral therapist and have seen many improvements- none of the visits have really involved our daughter but rather the therapist working with us and giving us tools to help teacher her self-calming skills and learning to react in a calmer manner when something doesn't fit her expectation. Anyway, something to think about...also, that even those of us who have kids from birth deal with VERY similar...fits :)<br />God Bless and please keep posting- the video of Tian talking about China just made my day!Kimhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17012343060419868539noreply@blogger.com