Sunday, April 12, 2015

Grow Old, Don't Want!

If the last post was titled "Language Boom 2," this one should be titled "Boom Boom POW!"  Sorry it's been so long since I last posted.  Life has happened and blogging was put on the back burner for a while.

We continue to see gains in the boys' language development, especially Travis'.  I'll share with you a story:

Last night, after Ken, the girls and I had been away for the weekend at the Empowered to Connect Conference (amazing, by the way), I was putting the boys to bed and reading a couple of books.  We began discussing age and how they both have birthdays coming up in the next few months.  I told them they are growing way too fast!  I pushed down on the top of their heads and said, "Stop it!! Stop growing!"  They both giggled and stood up on their tip-toes to get as high as possible.  I told them that they will eventually be taller than me.  Travis seemed curious at this and said, "But you'll always be older."
"Yes, I'll always be older.  Just like with your oldest sister. She's taller than me, but I'm older."  Then I counted with him, "You're 6 and I'm 40. When you're 7, I'll be 41."  Then I proceeded to sign simultaneously our ages as the years pass.  (That's something only signed languages can do, by the way. You can't count two different sets of numbers in spoken languages. ASL rocks!)
As I counted him up to 16 and me 50, he grew more and more somber, even sad.  I asked, "What's wrong?"  He shrugged and scowled.  "You look sad."  He whimpered the cutest little stifled cry and signed, "GROW-OLDER, I DON'T-WANT."

"Everyone gets older every year. We all grow up.  Why don't you want to grow up?"

"GROW-OLDER, I DIE. I DON'T-WANT."  Then he buried his head in my chest and hugged me tight.

Oh my mama heart!!

I hugged him and when he leaned back to visit again, I told him he didn't have to worry about dying. I reassured him that people live a long time.  (This wasn't the time to talk about how some people die young.)  We talked about our soul (had to clarify we weren't talking about a spooky ghost) and how we will always live and that God will always be close and we'll always be family. He proceeded to tell me that he didn't want to go to the hospital and die. We had a conversation about growing up and families.  He had just spent the weekend with my 70 year-old parents at the house, so I asked, "Nana and Pappy are very, very old (snicker) and are they dead?"  He answered, "Yes."

Okay. Let's rephrase that.  "NANA, PAPPY, *NOW* ALIVE, DEAD, WHICH?"
He answered, "Alive, but Pappy went to the hospital again and again."

Posing with his giant Easter bunny. Has only eaten the ears.
Wow.  I didn't realize he even thought about that.  So we continued to talk about how people get sick and go to the hospital, but that doesn't mean they are dead.  Then we looked at family photos and talked about my and Ken's parents and how they are all still living even though we are 40.  He was looking at a photo of himself with Grandma and Grandpa Brown from two years ago.  He described every detail about the photo, "That's Grandma Brown and that's Grandpa Brown and they gave me a train with a remote control. Grandma Brown hugged me."  He acted out the entire scene as if it had just happened. I'm glad he remembers and can recall and express his memories.



Tian with his bunny. It was eaten in 3 days.
(He did share some.)
Travis, Tian and I talked for an hour about families and growing up. Tian informed me that he will marry Alexis and that he "can't wait to be married!"  (Her dad better watch out now!) Travis expressed that he did not want to have babies.  When I asked why,  he honestly answered, "Because they cry and cry. I don't like it."  Maybe he and my older niece can move in together to a "no kids allowed" neighborhood. Watch and they will be the cousins with the most kids.

I can't tell you how much I love these talks and these boys!

2 comments:

  1. Yusss. And if D doesn't learn sign language, then they will never even have to communicate with each other. Ooh, I just had a vision of them as Becca and Kimmy Jin.

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  2. Hello there
    I just found your blog-
    We moved to the north Austin area just a month ago - we are a homeschooling family (my 2 boys) and we have a 3yo daughter from China. It's so great to hear of other adoptive and homeschooling families near.

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